Frankie doesn't go to Hollywood.

You can't go out cause your roots are showing, dye 'em bla, bla, bla... bleach them! Bleach 'em. Aren't I witty?!
I've been so lazy lately, can't be bothered to do anything. Just walking around feeling lonely and blue, being mad at myself for being so socially awkward. Must snap out of it.
I've slow started the snapping out tonight, by finally bleaching my roots. It was well overdue. Tomorrow I'm gonna snap out some more, by dying my hair pink. Using a different shade of pink this time, pastel pink. The result should be slightly lighter than last time. Oh the excitment, don't know if I can handle it all!

Frankie Stein. 
And no, this Frankie 
doesn't go to Hollywood. 
She's way too cool for that.

Oh and I did something the other day that I haven't done in ages, literally.
I bought a doll! I couldn't resist it, she's so cute, don't you agree? Her name is Frankie Stein and she's the daughter of Frankenstein's monster. The picture doesn't show it that well, but she's got seams and bolts in her neck and a fishnet top. She's aaawesome!  ^__^


Now, why didn't they make dolls like this when I was a kid? I had to cut and dye my Barbies hair, and give them extreme make ups myself! I actually had to be creative! Damn you toymakers, damn you!

Fitting in

I am planning on going to London at the end of the year/beginning of the new year. And since I hate to stand out in a crowd and look "touristy", I've decided to get myself a bowler hat. ;)
I've placed a bid on one, and so far I'm the highest bidder. So to all my british friends, keep your fingers crossed that I win the auction, and perhaps we can meet for tea and crumpets, in a not too distant future. ;D

The look I'm aiming for.

Decisions, decisions

I'm having serious problems. I've sold a pair of boots, which will cover the cost of the Kitsch Khaos bag that I posted earlier. Now, the problem I have is that I've found another bag, and now I can't make up my mind which bag(s) to buy. Thing is, that if I choose the "new" bag that I found, it will leave me enough money to get a second bag as well. A Jack Skellington bag at that!
Now, the problem is that I just can't decide which bag I like the most. Arr, the troubles I put on my precious mind.

VS

                           

Happiness in a box!

Happiness seems to arrive in the mail lately. And here's the latest one. I recieved my sugarpill parcel today.

The cutest little box ever, filled with happiness! It's enough to just look at the box to make you smile, and opening the box made me burst out in a "YAAAY", clapping my hands like a silly person. Not only does the awesome products come in the cutest wrappings, there was also a personal note on the invoice from Amy herself! ❤

Now, I can't wait to use my new sugarpill makeup!

I was going to write something about my little birthday celebration, but first I have to share something from last night.

They say that dogs should be caught in the act when doing something they aren't allowed. I know that. But sometimes it's just too obvious they have done something they aren't allowed to do.

Yesterday I was up in my bed watching TV when Dexter is walking up the stairs, nothing strange with that, but he didn't come to my room like he usually does, instead he stayed in the hallway and there was some strange noise coming from where he was. I called him, but he didn't come and the noise didn't stop so I went to see what he was doing, and this is the sight I met...

Sooo Dexter. Haven't I told you not to put your nose where it doesn't belong?! Getting caught in the toiletseat, it can only be Dexter. :D

Another year...

Has passed, and once again I'm turning 25! Crazy, I know. ;)

I got a very lovely surprise in the mail today, and it made me so happy. A birthday card from the sweetest, and quite obvious, the most talented girl I've ever had the pleasure of getting to know. (And Rob, he doesn't get any credit though ;)
I can't believe you made the effort of creating something so nice for me! Thank you Lucy, I absolutely love it. You really made my day. ❤

Isn't it lovely?! Me and Dexter. I can go on for ages about how much I love this picture, all the little details...! It's soooo lovely! Oh, sorry about the ugly text I put on it, did it to try and prevent some evil creature from stealing your image and claiming it for themselves! :P

The never ending story

I just got off the phone with the hospital, again. I called them once again to see if there was any progress. The nurse I spoke to this time, could see that I was planned for a meeting at the end of december... So, once again they are trying to fuck me over by delaying and delaying...
If I haven't mentioned this before, the appointment I'm waiting for, is at one of Swedens largest hospitals. Leading people on and lie to them is part of their job.

Neither the chief or the doctor in charge is available to get in contact with. One is on holiday, and the other is, god knows where, apparently. It is just so frustrating. Apparently the only way to get some attention in the matter and get someone to actually talk to me is going to the press... Yeah, seems like a good option, I hate the press. I'm just running out of options here. I don't know what to do anymore. All I know is that I won't let them win. I won't sit quietly and take their shit. But I'm just so sick of it, so wholeheartedly sick of being ignored and treated as if I were retarded. Completely and utterly sick of it.

Love

I'm in love. I can't stop thinking about you. You are so gorgeous. With you on my arm I would feel like the luckiest girl in the world. I need you, and I must make you mine.

The problem is though, that I'm in a tight spot financially right now, but I'm working on a way to pay for you. I must have you, you are absolutely positively charming!

Positively charming from Kitsch Khaos

I just must get my hands on this bag, the drool factor on this one is high. I've put up a few adds to sell some stuff so that I can afford this beauty, because I simply must have it. It's quite expensive though on the few sites that I've managed to find it, it's around £64 with shipping to Sweden. I really want the black/pink one shown above, and it seems to be the hardest model to find, well when I've tried to at least, so if anyone happen to find it somewhere, please let me know, ASAP!!

CRAZY NASTYASS HONEY BADGER

THIS IS THE BESTEST AWESOMEST YOUTUBE CLIP YOU WILL EVER SEE, BUT HONEY BADGER DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT, HE NASTY!

Wishlist pt. 1

I've also found what everyone else can get me for my birthday. Everything from the Sugarpill shop. And I do mean EVERYTHING!

❤ I love sugarpill ❤
Check out the lovely Amy's blog

I found what I'm getting myself for my birthday this year. It's perfect.

going mental?

So, I got a letter from the chief of operations a few weeks back. I wrote him regarding the treatment I've recieved from one of the doctors on his ward. The letter he wrote didn't touch the subject, or answered a single question asked. His reply was that he had got the letter from me, he had got the letter my mum sent him and also the letter that my pshychiatrist sent him. He said that I will have a meeting this autumn, with the doctor I've filed a complaint against, a colleague of his, and also my psychiatrist.

In curiosity I called the ward last week, to see if they had started on the arrangement for this meeting, since I know that it's gonna take them time to be able to get 3 doctors available for the same time and day. I wasn't counting on them having started to plan the arrangement yet. And I'm not quite sure why I was surprised to hear the woman say that the meeting should take part sometime late autumn. Once again they tell me one thing and put down another. I'm so sick of this. I talked to the woman at the discrimination agency today as well, and she had not yet talked to the doctors involved, but she recommended me to book an appointment with a general practician, show him all my documents, talk about the situation and see if he could help me get a referral to another hospital...

It feels like I'm stuck in a treadmill. No matter what I just keep ending up and the same point I started, banging my head against the wall.

Why is it so hard to see that I'm a person capable of making my own decisions, behind those words that's printed with me everywhere I go. Bipolar. It doesn't mean that I'm stupid and have trouble understanding. They won't even give me a chance becuase I'm bipolar. They won't even listen to my psychiatrist, when he's explaining the condition to them, or how the condition is with me. They prefer to read their ancient texts where the conclusion are more or less that if you are bipolar you're most likely to be completely insane and end up killing yourself.

I don't know for how much longer I can keep this up, and fight them. I'm just so sick of it all, sick of being treated like I'm mentally retarded. I would never have thought that doctors were allowed to do just as they please, lie straight to their patients faces just out of prestige. And just basically twist and turn the laws in any way needed to suit their case.

It is their right to waste my life. I've been waiting 4 years in total. What gives them the right to play with my life like this? I've Been mistread from day one I sought specialist care. Judged because I am bipolar. The mentallity of the people involved in this, makes it feel like I've been thrown back in time to 1840, and should be studied like a lab rat in an assylum. Or at least be locked away in one, because if you can't see or hear any trouble, there sure can't be any.

I know you lie. The question is, why?

blargh

Being outdoors is bad for you. The result of yesterday is that I spent most of today in bed with a cold. Stupid, stupid outdoors! :P

Love is in the city air

I feel elated. Elated and happy, believe it or not. (I'm bipolar, my mood changes fast, mmkay?).

I've spent the day in Stockholm city, underneath the scorching sun for a wonderful Pride 2011 festival. So many  beautiful people, so much happiness and love. Not even I could resist to be swept away by the happiness. I love  the gay community. Mostly because it's the least judgemental, and the most open minded community I've ever experienced. And filled with some of the most beautiful personalities I've ever come across.

I had to stop and ask some of the most fabulous people from the parade if I could take their picture, and I will post some of them. And as I was walking around the festival area, and the main shopping streets of Stockholm, I was quite surprised, happily I might add, when people randomly during the day walked up and asked if they could take a picture of me, or have their picture taken with me. I also had quite a few just walking up to me saying they loved my hair and that I was looking beautiful. I'm not really used to that, and I'm still grinning stupidly about that. I must've been looking more fab in the fluffy-bunny ears thingys than I thought! :P

Absolutely fabulous! Gorgeous, and I got a hug.. tehehhe

This dress was so bubbly and FAB!

Fabulous grrls!

A blue bunny :P

Tried to take a picture of the fluffy thingys of doom  that I was wearing on my head.

Oh, and I also have to show you the tattoo I got. It says "Stockholm county police department",  and yes, it is fake, but how often do you get a fake tattoo by the police? :D

We're getting serious now!

I'VE SEEN THEM TOO!

And this is getting heavy

And listen up kids! I just got a mail from the Marilyn Mansons webstore. They got a schoolstart special, order 2 t-shirts at the price of 1!!! ZOMG, gogogo little mansonites!

O_O

Yea, that's right

Everything still suck, and it's friday night and I'm drinking alone. Pathetic? Please, as if I didn't know already. If I care about it? Not really, no. Since I am aware of it, and actually sharing the infoz on ze interwebz.

I've decided to dedicate this night to self loathing and disgust. And yes, I take donations to support my on going studies of ze complex mind that is me. It's for a good cause! Not complex you say? Well FU, could've at least let me keep a little of my delusion of grandeur. And no, I'm the only one allowed to loathe myself, the rest of you can continue worshipping me.

Oh well. I'll just sit here on the outside poking the dirt, hoping that the kool kids will notice me, and let me join their game. It's a hard job, getting to be one of the "in crowd". The weirdos doesn't come very high on the list, or maybe that's just me. I'm just not good enough. JUST FOR ONCE I WOULD LIKE TO BE PICKED FIRST FOR THE FOOTBALL TEAM! Oh buhuhuhuhu. Well guess what, they day I get picked first, I'll stab your fucking football, throw it away and walk away laughing.

I ALWAYS MAKE SENSE!





BTW, DID YOU KNOW THAT I LOOK LIKE A 40 YEAR OLD WOMAN?!

Hihihaha poor attempts for insults like that is what you can get as reply when you're dealing with lesser minds... Ooooh the satisfaction it is to be me.

Aaaaanyway, from one thing to another. I'm going here tomorrow.

ALSO, SPOTIFY IS ASKING ME TO BE NICE TO MY US FRIENDS, ANYONE WANT A SPOTIFY INVITE??!?!

fired...?!

"Thank you for your friendship, it is no longer desired."


I think I just got fired...

What fool am I? I tell myself everyday, but obviously I never learn. I should not put my trust and hope in people, it only ends in disappointment.

What fool I am.

Yes, I'm emo.. So?