I'm blue... DABADEEE

No really, I am. Blue. Literally. I was watching corpse bride last night and got a litte inspiration for a halloween makeup. Although I can't really show a good picture of it, since I only got the crappy camera on my phone, still. But just picture it all blue!

unintended

Let's be totally emo tonight, drink red wine, write heartbreaking poetry and eat carrots. Just feel miserable, ok?

Well, I'm eating carrots at least, I don't fancy any red wine tonight, and I'm always emo. Hey, don't judge me, you would be too if you had to live with me like I do.

But yes. Tonights emo song is unintended by Muse. Beautiful music, beautiful lyrics and I'm emo enough to be able to relate to them. So let's put it on repeat, eat those carrots and be miserable together, deal?

parlez-vous français?

Very little I'm afraid. But I've been asked a few times why I write in english and not swedish. The answer is quite simple. I'm terribly international and speak english on a daily basis. When I started writing, I did it in swedish, but my curious non-swede friends demanded I start writing in english. Since I'm so humble and always aim to please, I followed the orders and changed the language. So, now you all know the reason why I write in english and not swedish.

Oh and just to clarify a little something. Not only am I terribly international, humble and totally awesome. I am also very down to earth, as I'm sure most of you have figured out by now.

Ciao xx

Hello

What do you want to do with your life?
-I want to die and be buried under a rock in the woods.

All I wish for...

Is that one day, someone will understand me. From the depth of my soul...

From childhood's hour I have not been as others were - I have not
seen as others saw - I could not And all I lov'd I lov'd alone. Then - in my childhood - in the dawn of a most stormy life
was drawn from every depth of good and ill the mystery which binds me still:
From the torrent, or the fountain, from the red cliff of the mountain,
from the sun that `round me roll'd in it's autumn tint of gold
from the lightning in the sky as it pass'd me flying by
from the thunder and the storm, and the cloud that took the form
(when the rest of heaven was blue) of a demon in my view.bring my passions from a common spring.
From the same source I have not taken my sorrow; I could not waken my heart to joy at the same tone.
And all I lov'd I lov'd alone. Then - in my childhood - in the dawn of a most stormy life
was drawn from every depth of good and ill the mystery which binds me still:
From the torrent, or the fountain, from the red cliff of the mountain,
from the sun that `round me roll'd in it's autumn tint of gold
from the lightning in the sky as it pass'd me flying by
from the thunder and the storm, and the cloud that took the form
(when the rest of heaven was blue) of a demon in my view.

for the luls

I found some old pictures of myself the other day, was quite hilarious. One thing that crossed my mind though is when I saw this one. I just couldn't help but think that with that bad makeup, I looked a little like Taylor Momsen. Maybe it's just me, but I think it was hilarious. Bad make up FTW!

Well, well, well!

Careful what you wish for, eh?

Just got back from the doctor and I just got prescribed 2 more pills to take each day! Bloody lovely, not only do I have to continue eating and cooking, I have to pop pills like a mad addict inbetween meals. FU karma, just FU...

The bane of my life...

Has got to be cooking. I loathe it, and it's so boring. It's not that I can't cook, don't get me wrong, I'm an excellent cook, it's just so god damn boring. And it's just as boring and time consuming to eat. Unfortunately I still have to do it every single day.
Since this is one of the great annoyances of my life I've been trying to come up with solutions. None very successful so far, but I think I have som good ideas. I just need to sell them to someone crazy enough to make it happen. I mean, come on, wouldn't it be just great if you could hook yourself up to an IV? Or, how about a pill that contains all the nutrients you need. 3 pills a day, breakfast, lunch and dinner? Spares you the trouble of cooking, doing the dishes and eating. I would buy it in a heartbeat.


 Oh, and I'm going to defy my cold tomorrow and try out pilates!!

AVC

I don't really have anything new and exclusive to write about. It's a change, I know.

I just want to share something that is of great importance to me, and means more to me than I can actually put words to.
I'm talking about the amazingly, beautiful music and lyrics, made by the fabulous Anna-Varney Cantodea and her Sopor aeternus and the ensemble of shadows. I never get tired of any of the songs, and when I've been in my lowest, darkest moments, Sopor is the only thing that can soothe me and make me feel safe. Every word, every note, is just hauntingly beautiful.
This song, No one is there is extra special to me because the lyrics is like a tale taken from my own life.

I hope at least some of you out there, take the time to really listen to it, and appreciate it for what it is. Pure beauty.

Bitterness

Insomnia, insomnia, insomnia... My old foe has come back to haunt me. Just what I need at the moment.
And the thoughts that I can't shake, are like a virus eating my brain. I'm not in control, I've lost my focus. I hate the anxiety, the empty feeling I have, of not knowing. The feeling of being ignored... I don't know what to do with myself. It's so exhausting being me. All I want to do is sleep, and right now that's the one thing I can't.

Oh well, I have a lecture in 4 hours. The only positive thing is that in 4 hours the virus in my brain will only feel like a distant memory, but my brain will be a mushy mess that won't know a thing of what's being said. Yaay, life is sweet.

There's no hope...

I surprise myself at times. I thought I knew myself pretty damn good by now, but then tonight I learned that I'm a soft hearted weakling. I've just spent the last half hour crying like a baby. Over a movie... I know right. I've been watching Marley & me. Yes, yes I know, it's been out for ages, I'm behind etc, etc. The film wasn't even that good, still it left me snivelling like mad... I like dogs damnit, what's your excuse?!

Something that probably won't make anyone end up in tears is following me on instagram. I'm posting my awesome( <-- uhu), adventures with my best buddy Darth Vader. To see this awesomeness, look up iodines.

Sneak peak. Me and Vader at a football game!